A little boy went up to his father and asked, "Dad,where did all of my intelligence come from?"
His father replied, "Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, because I still have mine."
His father replied, "Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, because I still have mine."
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What's the difference between people who pray in church and those who pray in casinos?
The ones in the casinos are serious.
The ones in the casinos are serious.
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When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.
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What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination?
Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything."
Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything."
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Anuj's teacher sent a note home to his Mother saying,
"Anuj seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about girls."
The Mother wrote back the next day,
"If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Father."
"Anuj seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about girls."
The Mother wrote back the next day,
"If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Father."
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Is that the...answering machine
The perfect messages to leave on your answering machine....
**** Hi. This is John:
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
**** Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages.
**** My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean.
They give to charity through the office and don't need their picture taken. They are also very happy with their current phone service. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.
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The College Special...
A is for academics, B is for beer.
One of those reasons is why we're not here. So leave a message.
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My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
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Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy.
Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right ... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll get back to you.
Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right ... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll get back to you.
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